The Eminem Show is filmed before a live studio audience "Alright kids, The Eminem Show is proud to present, The Mashpit's own, David and Shan!" This one is Mashpit certified Paper or plastic Presents itself as a decision with an obvious answer You pick paper 'cause the plastic will end up in the ocean Giving a whale cancer But did you know that The paper in this bag is made from the prickly peckerwood tree Which happens to be the residency of the dwarf-winged beaver bee And when the dwarf-winged beaver bees no longer have Homes in which to go, then I think you should know That they've been known to reconstruct their hives Right inside of those same whale's blowholes So you can weigh All these factors before you choose to decide But either way Know this A whale is gonna die No matter what you choose A whale is gonna die No matter what you do A whale is gonna die It's gonna be okay Except in the case you're a whale A whale is gonna die Dine in or take-out An inconsequential question at the fast food restaurant So you take it to go, then on the way home You know you start to smelling those french fries So you reach in the bag And take your eyes off the road and drive straight off a bridge And who knows what's in the water below So you should've dined in Huh? But if you dined in You decide to shake salt on those fries With the shaker that the previous guy coughed on And then you rub your eyes, oh no The next morning you wake up with a wicked face itch You drive to urgent care, your eyes swell shut Then you drive off the very same bridge from when You didn't dine in, and did I mention Both times you hit a whale A whale is gonna die No matter what you choose A whale is gonna die No matter what you do A whale is gonna die It's gonna be okay Except in the case you're a whale A whale is gonna die I hear your heart beat to the beat of the drums Oh, what a shame that you came here with someone So while you're here in my arms Let's make the most of the night Like we're gonna die young We're gonna die young We're gonna die young Let's make the most of the night (night, night) How dare you say that my behavior's unacceptable So condescending, unnecessarily critical I have the tendency of getting very physical So watch your step, 'cause if I do, you'll need a miracle You drain me dry and make me wonder why I'm even here The double vision I was seeing is finally clear You want to stay, but you know very well I want you gone Not fit to fuckin' tread the ground that I am walking on But when it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love You'll understand what I mean when I say "There's no way we're gonna give up" And like a little girl cries in the face Of a monster that lives in her dreams Is there anyone out there? 'Cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe A whale is gonna die No matter what you choose A whale is gonna die No matter what you do A whale is gonna die It's gonna be okay Except in the case you're a whale A whale is gonna die [Beatbox Solo from Rock Your Body] [Whistling from Whistle] [Whistling from All Star]

This one is Mashpit certified I had a way then Losin' it all on my own I had a heart then But the queen has been overthrown And I'm not sleepin' now The dark is too hard to beat You show the lights that stop me turn to stone You shine it when I'm alone And so I tell myself that I'll be strong And dreaming when they're gone You show the lights that stop me turn to stone You shine it when I'm alone Noises, I play within my head Touch my own skin And hope that I'm still breathin' And I think back to when My brother and my sister slept You show the lights that stop me turn to stone You shine it when I'm alone And so I tell myself that I'll be strong And dreaming when they're gone 'Cause they're callin', callin', callin' me home Callin', callin', callin' home [Whistling from All Star] No scrub (No, no) No scrub (No, no) No scrub (No, no) No scrub (No, no) You show the lights that stop me turn to stone You shine it when I'm alone And so I tell myself that I'll be strong And dreaming when they're gone 'Cause they're callin', callin', callin' me home Callin', callin', callin' home, home

I can't stop partying, partying I can't stop partying, partying I gotta have Patrón, I gotta have the beat I gotta have a lot of pretty girls around me Oh, I can't stop partying, partying I can't stop, partying, partying I gotta have the cars, I gotta have the jewels And if you was me, honey, you would do it too Monday to Sunday I hit all the clubs And now e'rybody know me when I pull up I got the real big posse with me, yeah I'm deep And if you lookin' for me I'm in VIP Just follow the smoke; they're bringing bottles of the Goose And all the girls in the corner getting loose Screw rehab I love my addiction No sleep, no sleep, I am always on a mission cause I can't stop partying, partying I can't stop partying, partying I gotta have Patrón, I gotta have the beat I gotta have a lot of pretty girls around me Oh, I can't stop partying, partying I can't stop, partying, partying I gotta have the cars, I gotta have the jewels And if you was me, honey, you would do it too Uh, party like tomorrow is my funeral Gotta stop mixing alcohol with pharmaceuticals And the unusual is the fucking usual Man, my life is beautiful and my girls are mutual Okay bitches, Weezer and it's Weezy Upside down MTV Please don't shoot me down because I'm an endangered species It's the days of our lives but my night just started I pray the killer doesn't take the life of the party I can't stop partying, partying I can't stop partying, partying I gotta have Patrón, I gotta have the beat I gotta have a lot of pretty girls around me Oh, I can't stop partying, partying I can't stop, partying, partying I gotta have the cars, I gotta have the jewels And if you was me, honey, you would do it too I can't stop partying, partying I can't stop partying, partying I gotta have Patrón, I gotta have the beat I gotta have a lot of pretty girls around me I can't stop partying, partying Can't stop, can't stop the partying I can't stop partying, partying Can't stop, can't stop the partying Oh Can't stop, can't stop the partying Oh Can't stop, can't stop the partying

My name is Jonas, I'm carryin' the wheel Thanks for all you've shown us, but this is how we feel Come sit next to me, pour yourself some tea Just like Grandma made when we couldn't find sleep Things were better then, once but never again We've all left the den, let me tell you about it The choo-choo train left right on time A ticket cost only your mind The driver said, "Hey man, we go all the way" Of course we were willing to pay My name is Wepeel, got a box full of your toys They're fresh out of batteries, but they're still making noise, making noise Tell me what to do, now the tank is dry Now this wheel is flat, and you know what else? Guess what I received in the mail today Words of deep concern from my little brother The building's not goin' as he planned The foreman has injured his hand The dozer will not clear a path The driver swears he learned his math The workers are going home, the workers are going home The workers are going home, the workers are going home, yeah The workers are going home, the workers are going home The workers are going home, yeah, yeah, yeah My name is Weep

You call me all friendly Tellin' me how much you miss me That's funny, I guess you've heard my songs Well, I'm too busy for your business Go find a girl who wants to listen 'Cause if you think I was born yesterday, you have got me wrong So I cut you off I don't need your love 'Cause I already cried enough I've been done I've been movin' on since we said goodbye I cut you off I don't need your love So you can try all you want Your time is up, I'll tell you why You say you're sorry, but it's too late now So save it, get gone, shut up 'Cause if you think I care about you now Well, boy, I don't give a fuck I remember that weekend When my best friend caught you creepin' You blamed it all on the alcohol So, I made my decision 'Cause you made your bed, sleep in it Play the victim and switch your position I'm through, I'm done So I cut you off I don't need your love 'Cause I already cried enough I've been done I've been movin' on since we said goodbye I cut you off I don't need your love So you can try all you want Your time is up, I'll tell you why You say you're sorry, but it's too late now So save it, get gone, shut up 'Cause if you think I care about you now Well, boy, I don't give a fuck I see you tryna get to me I see you beggin' on your knees Boy, I don't give a fuck So stop tryna get to me Tch, get up off your knees 'Cause, boy, I don't give a fuck About you No, I don't give a damn You keep reminiscin' on when you were my man But I'm over you Now you're all in the past Your time is up, I'll tell you why I'll tell you why You say you're sorry, but it's too late now So save it, get gone, shut up (Too late now) 'Cause if you think I care about you now Well, boy, I don't give a fuck (Boy, I don't give a) I see you tryna get to me I see you beggin' on your knees Boy, I don't give a fuck So stop tryna get to me (get to me) Tch, get up off your knees 'Cause, boy, I don't give a fuck

Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) It's been some time since we last spoke This is gonna sound like a bad joke But Momma, I fell in love again It's safe to say I have a new girlfriend And I know it sounds so old But Cupid got me in a chokehold And I'm afraid I might give in Towel's on the mat, my white flag is wavin' (Mbabarara) I mean, she even cooks me pancakes And Alka-Seltzer when my tummy aches If that ain't love then I don't know what love is Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) It's been a while since we talked last And I'm tryin' hard not to talk fast But Dad, I'm finally thinkin' I may have found the one Type of girl that'll make you way proud of your son And I know you heard the last song About the girls that didn't last long But I promise this is on a whole new plane I can tell by the way she says my name (Mbabarara) I love it when she calls my phone She's even got her very own ringtone If that ain't love then I don't know what love is (Mbabarara) It's gonna be a long drive home But I know as soon as I arrive home And I open the door, take off my coat, and throw my bag on the floor She'll be back into my arms once more for sure like Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) She's got a smile that'll make the most senile Annoying old man bite his tongue (I'm not done) She's got eyes comparable to sunrise And it doesn't stop there (Man, I swear) She's got porcelain skin, of course she's a ten Now she's even got her own song (But movin' on) She's got the cutest laugh I ever heard And we can be on the phone for three hours (Not sayin' one word) And I would still cherish every moment And when I start to build my future, she's the main component Call it dumb, call it luck, call it love Or whatever you call it, but Everywhere I go I keep her picture in my wallet like Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) Take a look at my girlfriend (girlfriend) She's the only one I got (Mbabarara) Not much of a girlfriend (girlfriend) I never seem to get a lot (Mbabarara, mbabarara) I hear your heart beat to the beat of the drums Oh, what a shame that you came here with someone So while you're here in my arms Let's make the most of the night Like we're gonna die young We're gonna die young We're gonna die young Let's make the most of the night Like we're gonna die young Let's make the most of the night Like we're gonna die young Young hearts, out our minds, runnin' 'til we outta time Wild childs, lookin' good, livin' hard just like we should Don't care who's watchin' when we tearin' it up (You know) That magic that we got, nobody can touch (Fo' sho') Lookin' for some trouble tonight (Yeah) Take my hand, I'll show you the wild side Like it's the last night of our lives (Uh-huh) We'll keep dancin' 'til we die I hear your heart beat to the beat of the drums Oh, what a shame that you came here with someone So while you're here in my arms Let's make the most of the night Like we're gonna die young We're gonna die young We're gonna die young Let's make the most of the night Like we're gonna die young [Whistling from All Star]